At a coaching summit I attended in February one of the keynote speakers – Lynne Twist (whose book, The Soul of Money, I very much recommend) spoke about one of the most destructive and yet most spread myths of the modern world: more is better. We are encouraged to consume more to “help” the economy, we are constantly sold things we don’t need through clever advertising campaigns, and we are doped into believing that the more we have of anything the happier we’ll be. Meanwhile, the constant race for more creates stress, frustration, and feelings of never being able to catch up – while depleting precious natural resources.
In the course of her talk, Lynne Twist mentioned that the storage industry is one of the fastest growing industries in the United States and the fact that we are building houses for our stuff makes absolutely no sense when there are so many homeless people. This got me thinking that as expatriates, we are actually lucky because we get to go through our stuff every few years when we move and we get to de-clutter on a regular basis.
Of course one of the hardest things about organizing a move (apart from saying good-byes…) is deciding what to take and what to discard. Those decisions not only take time, but also force us to say yes to some memories and no to others.
So how do you decide which memento of the past still deserves a place in your life and which doesn’t? How do you decide which one of your possessions to donate? And what is the ultimate test that helps you determine what will stay?
I have a system. It may or may not work for you, but I found that it works wonders for me. When I begin the moving process I ask myself the following questions about those things that I consider keeping:
• What is the energy behind this thing? What feeling do I get from it?
• What does it represent to me now?
• How important is it to me now?
• How important is it to my future path?
Many objects that we hold on to may represent who we were long ago and not who we are now. Some may come from times that have been difficult and resonate with memories of sadness; others may have been symbolic to us in the past, but no longer carry the same meaning. Why hold on to them then? Why drain yourself and your house of energy with clutter that is not useful for who you are becoming?
When people, who have not experienced expatriate lifestyles, say to me how difficult it must be to move every few years, I usually respond that it’s a blessing and an opportunity. It allows me to part with the old and invite the new into my life. I find that very inspirational.
The things that don’t make it onto the moving list find their next owner in 99% of the cases. Internet has allowed us to connect with people who may want and need the stuff you have – so before you add to the ever-growing trash pile out there, consider tapping into those resources!
© Margarita Gokun Silver
Margarita Gokun Silver is a writer and an artist. Her work has appeared in The New York Times, The Washington Post, BBC, The Atlantic, The Guardian, and NPR, among others. Her essay collection I NAMED MY DOG PUSHKIN (AND OTHER IMMIGRANT TALES) is available on Amazon (https://buff.ly/39AsHhL) or wherever books are sold.